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Come fly the fruity skies

There is sadness in San Antonio, today. Citizens will have to make due with ghost riders in the sky, because they will not see a floating banana anytime soon. Yes, it was announced last week that there...

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The McBournie Minute: Break the fast with the hair of the dog

There is a good chance many of you don’t know this, but I am a gourmet chef. I taught myself, and I believe it is now time for me to have my own cooking show. Of course, the world is saturated with...

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Online cig retailers can’t quit cold turkey

The FDA sent out a warning letter to 14 online companies that are breaking new cigarette laws, which indicates that the FDA may be a UN organization. The companies received the written hand-wringing...

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Take it from Snee: Be very afraid

When I read that a dead body had been found in one of the Los Angeles International Airports’ bathrooms, I said, “Thank God.” What? That’s not good news? How do you figure? I didn’t hear any of what...

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More fruit! More fruit!

You know how everyone’s supposed to eat five servings of fruit a day? If you didn’t, that’s OK, because you’re supposed to eat eight servings now. According to a new study in Europe, people who eat...

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Welcome to (a preview of) Herman Cain’s America

People of all stripes have been arguing that America’s in a bad place right now. Our deficit is soaring, our rich are hogging up all the yachts and our kids — man, they suck. They’re fat, their music...

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Take it from Snee: Opposite Day

When British General Lord Cornwallis surrendered to George Washington, his drum and fife corps played “The World Turn’d Upside Down.” History is full of opposite days. So much so, in fact, that I spent...

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What can brown rice do for you?

Angry or depressed? Lay off the Wonder Bread and eat something multigrain, you doof. The Guys read the news every day. We’re such old hands at it that we sometimes recognize when a story misses the...

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